“A short pencil is better than a long memory”

Do you ever take the time to write?

I don’t just mean long form writing; I mean quick little notes, capturing quotations, making to do lists, etc.

My handwriting is not the greatest, but I have grown to appreciate the analog process of putting pen to paper. Very millennial of me…

Honestly, I see it as invaluable at the moment. It has helped me do well at what I set my mind to, it has helped me process confusion and unknowns, it has given plans to things I’ve wanted to build, and it’s helped me to articulate more clearly to my family, friends, and team members.

As I have continued to experiment with physical (read “mostly non-digital”) writing, I’ve grown to have five (5) main types or categories of writing that serve various purposes:

1. Quick Reminders
2. Idea Scratchpad
3. Brain dump
4. Journalling
5. Letters

2. Scratchpad

I’ve grown to be a man of many ideas for projects. I’ve mentioned this in the past, but as best I can I try to only have one (1) active home project at time.

The basis for one home project at a time is to try and better manage home chaos, when possible, given I have less control of that chaos at work. Doesn’t always work… but at least I can try…

Part of that process is sketching up various ideas, capturing a to do list or purchase list, drawing up a design, figuring out electrical schematics, keeping up with measurements for something I’m building, etc.

Having somewhere to simply draw it all out and keep up with it is invaluable to me.

I sometimes use the Travelers notebook I mentioned above to capture portions of this.

Tools I use:

• Engineering paper with the grid lines or dots
• Basic Clipboard
• Any pencil can write and an eraser (harder to come by than you’ may think…)

3. Brain dump

This next method is more involved than some of the others. This one comes into play when you find yourself mentally spinning. If you were to visualize it, you’re stuck on the surface in your brain but at the same time feel like there is a depth in there that you haven’t been able to tap into. You keep circling the same topic(s) and it’s starting to overwhelm you.

~10 years ago now I found a hack that works for myself, and I continue to recommend it to others.

Start writing it out.

Ask yourself questions like you would a friend who you know and trust (e.g. 5 why’s or Why’s that bother you?).

Don’t stop until you feel the edge come off of your stress or frustration.

It sometimes takes hours but, for me at least, it does come eventually.

The first time I did this; I spent a couple hours at a coffee shop writing. I had convinced myself not to stop working through it until I felt I had worked through it engouh.

The key I’ve found is that you don’t have to get to the resolution or the answer, you just need to get more than surface level out of your head. You do this by dedicating time to working through a portion of the stressor or mental block.

For example, say that you’re feeling called to move somewhere with your family, but you know there are a ton of cascading implications. You know there are soooo many implications that you get stuck on the “feeling called to move somewhere”.

Find a couple hours to be alone (or alone in a public place).

• Take some paper
• Take a pen
• Take headphones
• Get a cup of coffee
• Turn your phone off or on Do Not Disturb (yes, this is OK).
• Face out a window or away from the general chaos of the place you’re in.
• Start writing.

Example:

• We feel like we’re supposed to move from X to Y. Why? (answer the why)
• (the answer) Because in prayer, community, and as time has passed we think it’s the right thing for us in our journey. We really think we’d enjoy it and it’d be fun for our family to be part of. Why is there a pause or hitch in your step?
• We’d be moving a bit further from family, our grandparents are aging, and we do enjoy our community right now….
• <keep going>
• At some point, at least for me, the questions started to pivot away from “Why” based questions to more of a mitigating type question. For example, What could or should I do to accommodate the further away from family aspect?

Each time I’ve taken to doing this, the end result is much less stress and much more clarity.

I don’t understand it fully… but there is just something about taking a minute to go analog and getting thoughts out of your mind and into a different medium.

Tools I use:

• Pen/Pencil
• Paper
• Time alone

4. Journaling

I don’t remember having a journal as a kid. Never really had the practice of capturing down thoughts or writing letters to a diary or anything like that.

Really never thought about it until I was into my 30’s.

Then, probably 5 years ago now, we were sitting in a church service, and the pastor mentions this “5 year journal” that he uses called “A few lines a day“.

It has a page for each day of the year. It also has 5 sections on each page creating space for 5 years. Each section is large enough for maybe four or five bullet points… which aligns with the concept of “A few lines a day”…

For some reason that concept really stood out to me. I forget if I bought it or if Rachel bought it for me for Christmas… but starting January 1st, 2020 I started writing a few lines each day.

Nothing too thoughtful, really just an end of day reflection of highlights. I knew that if I took too much time thinking about it and not just doing a raw dump of thoughts that I’d likely avoid doing it regularly or give up on it.

I didn’t realize it at the time… but the true value though comes in Year 2+.

As you flip over to a new page, you read back through what was going on last year during that same period.

Year 3… you get 2 years of reflection.

Year 4… 3 years.

Now into year 5, it’s an engrained nightly routing and I’m regularly looking back at the past 4 years of various events. Kids being born, moving homes, soccer, ballet, work situations, home being built. The happiness, the stressors, the fun.

I find myself regularly reflecting between “ahh… this too shall pass” and “that was fun” and “you remember this?”

Being in year 5 and looking toward the end of this year, I’ve found myself wondering about if I’ll get another one… and if I do what it may feel like to start over again.

Tools I use:

• “A few lines a day” notebook – (link)

5. Letters

If you have never received a handwritten letter… start writing them to people in hopes of getting one in return.

I don’t know why I feel this way, but I genuinely appreciate a handwritten letter.

Something is different about a nice piece of paper, a good pen, and someone taking the intentional time to write out a letter and mail it or deliver it to me.

I have literally framed a letter that my dad handwrote and sent to me.

Can you imagine back before typewriters, handwritten letters were the default… and now Schools debate on whether or not to teach people cursive.

There is something impersonal about typed letters, emails, texts. that a hand-written letter breaks the barrier of.

Maybe it’s that we’re in such a busy world that we look at handwriting as a waste of time given QWERTY keyboards.

A handful of years ago some close married friends of ours mentioned they have a notebook they pass back and forth at various occasions during the year. The intention of the notebook is to write handwritten letters to one another. Think birthdays, anniversaries, various holidays, a random/thoughtful Tuesday.

Rachel and I thought this was a good idea, so we started one a few years back. We’ve come up with our own, quirky, rules.

For example, if it’s my turn on valentines… I don’t want her to just read my letter… write me another one back and put it back in my lap before the day is out. First, it annoys me that it’s back in my lap again… Second, more seriously though, it takes effort to think through a letter.

Another thing Rachel came up with is for each of our children, we’ve bought them a notebook. Every year on their birthday she and I both write letters to them. We each have our own style, reflection, and humor we put in them. We haven’t really discussed our long-term thinking there, but I could see 60 years from now them picking their notebooks off the shelf and reading through the years of various notes to their kids. Maybe we’ll write them for our grandkids one day too.

Tools I use:

• Simple Leather Notebook (link)
• For Kids, a simple notebook (link)

At the end of the day

At the end of the day, I’ve found “a short pencil is better than a long memory” to be a true quote for me. I’ve also found getting away from digital and going analog is really refreshing and enabling. It takes time, practice, and, often times, concentration.

Do you have any best practices or pro-tips you use?